it's been a long time since ive blogged. that's cause my stupid house internet is down. so now im in the school library using the com during my free period when im suppose to be studying. but i need to update my blog to vent out everything about how i am feeling.

keeping it boiled deep down inside is really killing me.

there's so many things on my mind la! i dont know where to start and everything.
help me somebody.

okay, i shall start with my church stuff.
alot of people have been telling me to step up and rise up to what im suppose to be, however i cant. cause my emotions are stopping me. somehow i just feel that im not good enough.
so many people wanna help me but ... sigh.. why cant i just skip thru this whole episode of me getting hurt and move on to the part where im perfectly fine and im all that, that God has intented me to be? why cant i just fast forward everything?

my O's are coming, yet im still letting all this things affect me. how am i suppose to do well?
i just went of my dpa interview a few days ago. im really trusting God on this. to have faith that i will get into the course which He has opened the door to. but im still afraid.. you know.. if you understand. but i dont think anyone will.

then finally, my emotions. why must there be such things as breakups.
breakups arent fun. for all those who dont know, im not attached. was never. but breakup in the sense that .. you break off everything you had with the person.

to you:
how do you move on so fast? teach me pls. i want to move on. somethings holding me back and it aint fun.

to the other you:
dont lead people on. im not saying anything. but i told you this before. dont lead people on when you dont like them (: just a side note to let you know, so you wont hurt anyone.

so that's basically it for now.
im fine now actually. all these that im blogging is for the past one month. now everything is much better. so all those who read my blog. dont worry. im really okay. trust me on this. im having STUDY THERAPY. it's cool okay!! hahahha.

prelims are coming in 2 weeks time! please pray for me!!!!!!! ((: